Are you into the dating scene?
Do you find that some women are turned off by you for some unknown reason? Lisa
Copeland is a dating coach and I have borrowed some of her thoughts about what women
find objectionable about men on the first date.
Ladies tell how
excited they are being chosen as the woman you want to meet. Anticipation sets
in about whether you will like them – as clothes are scattered about while searching
for the perfect outfit to impress you in the hope the rendezvous will kick off
greater expectations for a future relationship.
You
knock on her door and disappointment immediately engulfs her because you have
not met her expectations.
What
are her expectations?
They are based on common sense.
1. You should dress showing you care about
yourself. Tuxedos and suits are not
required unless you are expecting to marry her on the first date, however
abandon the baggy torn jeans and disheveled shirt. There are many discount
stores to purchase stylish attire for the big date. Look good; make a pleasant
impression to get that second date with her.
2.
Aging takes its toll, but is no excuse or physical sloppiness. Dirty teeth, bad
breath, skin tags on your neck are not exciting visions that invite a woman to
kiss, touch or caress you. If this is you… go to a doctor and dentist before
beginning your dating adventures, or you will be passed over for other more
presentable man – not looking like they went twelve rounds with Mike Tyson.
3.
Be honest on dating websites – no bait and switch. Your photo must be authentic
no matter how overweight or homely your appearance. Post a picture of yourself from
ten years ago and she will not recognize you when waiting your arrival at the
restaurant. Don’t hide anything because it will make her wonder about you.
4.
Don’t begin your date telling the lady gross stories about your flea infested
dog if you expect her to hug you. Most likely she will want to rush home and
fumigate her clothes. That is a strike out. Keep the story telling light and
general.
5.
If you initiate the date – pull out your wallet and pay for it. Later on she
will be happy to share the bill or treat you. If you’re broke fix your finances
before dating.
6.
On the first date don’t go on and on about your wonderful life. She’s not
interested in your pictures and memories. She wants to get to know you a
little, not your life history. Don’t hog the conversation because she won’t
stop your self-conceited dissertation that is turning her off. Encourage her to
participate in the conversation by asking questions and then listen. She will
think you a great conversationalist. Give and take is more effective and enjoyable.
7.
Keep your passions on politics to yourself because you will turn her off after
ten minutes. Most ladies don’t enjoy talking about politics although they do
have opinions. Feel her out slowly over time or drop it completely.
8.
What about the good night kiss on the first date? Don’t expect one, but if you
chance it don’t jam your tongue down her throat. Be gentle and gallant with a
kiss on her hand or cheek… so continental. Let her decide if she wants to share
a French kiss with you. Women are romantic lovers to be cultivated over time.
If you’re looking for a one night stand and a notch on the bedpost – it’s not
your call, it is her call. Don’t set yourself up to strike out on the first
date.
These issues that turn
women off are more about protecting their privacy, independence and respect
than reading men the riot act. Go slow, be nice, gallant, accommodating and
good chance she will want more of you as the relationship develops. Keep in
mind she may have been victim to several male predators and doubts the level of
gallantry of many men these days. Be special for your lady and win the day.
Share with me your experiences, comments and questions and I would love to answer.
Steve
Kerner – Over 50… A Divorced Man’s Point Of View
Becoming
Extraordinary
By Loving Life Through People
Find Lisa
Copeland at these links:
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